Tired

I’ve been kind of on edge the past couple weeks: at turns happy, sad, annoyed, frustrated. And, mostly just tired.

It was a big couple weeks for Brian, he has taken a new job. Consequently, I took care of Jameson’s two days off from daycare for pink eye, and likewise I had to take off again this past Friday when he vomited at daycare twice (and when I also didn’t feel 100% myself).

Meanwhile, Brian has been dealing with an ear infection and sinus infection which are now getting better. Whatever bug Jameson and I had on Friday seemed to be a very mild 24 hour bug and nothing that nearly 12 hours of sleep (for myself) couldn’t cure.

So here we are, all feeling better (finally). Settling into a new routine where Brian gets home about 10 minutes later. Enjoying our new walking almost-toddler. But my mood is still uncertain.

I don’t talk about it a lot, but a majority of my time is spent at work, and at work, I’m feeling generally unhappy, lonely, frustrated and even a little bitter from past events that just won’t go away. And quite a bit of confusion because of the reorganization going on that no one seems to want to be completely transparent about.

At home, I’m feeling unproductive from all the unfinished projects and the dirty house (because we stopped having a house cleaner come over).

Yes, there is a lot to be thankful for and a lot of joy watching Jameson grow and develop. And in the evenings I try to put everything else aside (and most of the time I’m successful). But sometimes I think we don’t spend enough time talking about the other stuff. Because I spend most of my time away from all this:

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3 Comments

  1. I understand how you feel. We do have someone clean the house every 2 weeks but I still feel like the clutter and toys take over my life! I always feel like the laundry isn’t done (usually in the dryer or piled on the guest bed) or the dishwasher needs emptying and then refilling.. By the time Logan is asleep I am too tired to give a crap about any of it and just have some wine and sit on the couch in a daze.

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